Recollections and Reality's
by Minervarulezxx
Summary: can love outshine anything and survive the years, and will she finally admit her own feelings to herself and the one she loves the most. MMHG femslash so be warned. rating may change  chpter 2 now up
1. Chapter 1

_**Title:** Recollections and Reality's_

_**Pairing:** Minerva McGonagall & Hermione Granger_

_**Set (time):** ten years after the events of book 7 2011_

_**Summary:** can love outshine anything and survive the years, and will she finally admit her own feelings to herself and the one she loves the most._

_**Disclaimer:** I do not own Harry Potter or any of its characters, and no matter how much i wave my magic wand i am not JK Rowling. I'm just borrowing them for a bit, and they will all go back to normal when I'm done i promise._

_**Authors notes:** This story was developed my myself and a member called **Maggie Snow**, I'd like to thank her for helping me come up with the ideas and background for this fic, as i was stuck as to where to start with another MM/HG fic. Well here it is and i hope you like it, also thanks to my beta readers **dcmasters** and **thebillforever**. Luv Minervarulez xx_

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**Chapter 1: Recollections**

_I can still recall the day i realised that my feelings for her were maybe more than friendship. I can still recall the day that i knew i had fallen head over heels for that marvellous, courageous, beautifully intelligent dark haired green eyed witch. It was half way through my fifth year at Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry that i Hermione Jean Granger had fallen completely and utterly in love with Minerva McGonagall. Throughout my remaining years as s student at the school i had hoped that my silly little crush (which at the time i thought it was) would go away, but if anything my feelings only seemed to get stronger. And at our final stand in Hogwarts great hall at the end of what was meant to be my 7th year i realised that these feeling i had been having since my 5th year would never go away. Watching her battle gracefully, her hair loose from it's usual tight bun, the gash on her cheek, i was transfixed, for she seemed more beautiful to me than ever. I never thought i could tell her then how i felt (i regret that now), how could i, she could never feel the same way, i was just a silly know-it-all student, well that's what i told myself anyway._

_When i did finally buck up the courage to tell her how i felt, it was a few days after the final battle, i was a watching her attend to everyone else but herself, always the caring one. I couldn't help but go over to her and see if she was ok. She was fine of course glad the battle was over, and pretty gratefully that she only had the cut on her face to show for her efforts, but to me she was still the most beautiful woman in the room. She kept telling me not to fuss over her, that she was ok and i was just being silly, but i couldn't help it, i loved her and when i blurted it out to her the happiness i saw reflected in her eyes caused my heart to skip several beats. But as soon as it had flickered behind her eyes the sooner it was gone again – her mask was back up and she told me i was being ridiculous and that i had no idea what i was saying. But i wasn't being ridiculous, was i? I could have sworn i saw something behind those sea-green eyes of hers._

_Well that was all ten years ago, and i have been back at Hogwarts for nearly two years now. She is still the Headteacher and still teaches Transfiguration to the schools students, (i don't think she would ever let anyone take her place as long as she remains at Hogwarts, transfiguration is a subject she is truly passionate about). She still looks the same as she did while i was a student, mind you witches and Wizards age differently to non-magical folk don't they._

_When i first returned to Hogwarts, i thought i had truly gotten over her, it had taken me several years, but i thought i had. I was wrong. I quickly discovered that i could not have been any further from the truth. The moment i entered her office on my first day back, those feelings had came rushing back and hit me like a tidal wave, i did not say anything for i had come to value her friendship more than anything over the years._

_We quickly fell into a routine of friendly talks in her office, talking about anything and everything. My feelings kept getting stronger and stronger, and i could tell she can see it too. There are occasions that i catch her glancing at me with that same look i saw in her eyes ten years ago, but she masks it too quickly. I guess I'll just have to wait and see if she does truly feel the same way, but i will not confront her or tell her i still feel for her after all these years, for i don't want to ruin a friendship i have come to value as dearly as the woman herself. A friendship i could not live without._

Hermione put down her quill and closed her diary. It had been a long time since she had written in it. Even if all her entries had been along the same lines she had thought she had better update it before she got completely bogged down with work, this was her second year back at the school and well the work load was still getting to her a little. But she had become more adept at her time keeping and in a few weeks hopefully she would have mastered all her marking.

She glanced up at the clock, it was getting late and as it was the weekend, she and Minerva had to go into Hogsmeade. Minerva had asked Hermione to join her, and try as she could Hermione couldn't help but get her hopes up, for everytime they were alone she wished Minerva would admit her feelings and tell Hermione she loved her too. Well she could dream couldn't she.

She turned the lights out with a quick flick of her wand and padded bare foot through her quarters to bed. Tomorrow was another day, full of promise and well she couldn't help the niggling feeling in the back of her head that told her something was about to happen.

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_Like it love it, let me know what you think by reviewing, _

_Minervarulez xx_


	2. Chapter 2

_Disclaimers: see chapter 1 as well they kinda still apply_

_A/N: this wasn't really what i intended for chapter 2 but it kinda popped into my head (sorry for the slight out of characterness but i couldn't help the fluffyness lol)._

_Just want to say a thank you to those who have reviewed already and cheers to my beta - you know who you are lol (n i sorry for subjecting you to even more MM/HG lol) - oh and i changed my pen name lol_

_xx Minerva rulez xx_

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Chapter 2

Recollections of another

She didn't know why she was so worked up this morning or why she felt the need to pull every set of robes in her wardrobe to find a set in someone else's favourite colour. What had gotten into her she had no idea, it wasn't as if she was going on a major date (that idea was laughable to her, since when would anyone ask her on a date or even find her attractive enough to ask her – well that's always what she told herself), it was only a supervisory trip to Hogsmeade, with the students and some of the staff. But today felt different. If she was truthful Minerva McGonagall, Headmistress and transfiguration professor of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry was extremely giddy and maybe even slightly nervous about today's trip (something that was very out of character for her) and she didn't want to admit to herself why. Even if those particular feelings had been there for as long as she could remember.

She sat herself down on the edge of her four poster bed and thought for a few minutes.

_It all started when that bright intelligent young muggle born witch first entered the double doors that were the entrance to Hogwarts School. The minute that i Minerva McGonagall rested my sea green eyes on Hermione Granger i knew that this young witch was different and would most certainly make i difference, and not only to my own life but to everyone's around her._

_Watching her grow up and change into the beautifully attractive young lady she had become over the years, i couldn't help but find herself somewhat attracted to her in her later school years. And i had battled with it secretly for years, hating myself for falling for a student, something that just should not have been done in any case._

_It was something that since Hermione's sixth year at the school i had kept a secret(I hadn't even told my best friend). Content i was just to remain the young woman's Mentor, friend and confident, and I thought i had been managing it really well with keeping a professional distance and besides i didn't want to loose her position at the school (it would mean being away from her, and I couldn't imagine a day without seeing Hermione's face at the Gryffindor table or inmyr classroom). But over the years whenever Hermione was extremely upset or hurting in anyway I couln't help but have that overwhelming need to take her in her arms, hold her and tell her everything would be alright and to comfort her, resolved to the fact that this would be the only kind of contact that i could and would ever have with my Hermione, and that to me, was better than nothing at all._

_However that all changed the night of the final battle. I had spent the last year doing my best to keep my professional distance (and there were times that it was harder than others) only to have Hermione Granger tell me that she "Can't help it, I worry because I love you so much, I don't want to see you suffering so, not when I can help" she reached her hand up to my face and brushed her fingers against the nasty looking gash across it, as if trying to numb the slight pain. I had felt my heart skip joyfully at those words and the gentle loving contact she had just given me. But not knowing what to do or how to react (even if I had played the senario over and over in my head many times since) I retreated, throwing regultion and school protocal at her. Hurting not only her but myself as well. I knocked her back, and a few days later she left, I don't blame her really, I probably would have as well. The only contact I had with her during the next several years was the occasional letter, letting me know how she was, how Harry and Ginny were getting on, that she and Ron were an item then not an item (the smile that crept to my face upon reading that was one of the few that graced my face since she had left Hogwarts halls), that she had passed her potions and was looking for a job. That was two years ago now, nd I took no time at all in offering her the now vacent post here at the school. And it was on of the happiest days for me since the war when I got her reply saying she accepted the post. I could have jumped around and danced about if I didn't have Neville Longbottom in my office at the time._

_Anyway she's been back here at the school for two years and I'm more in love with her than I ever thought possible, but its silly of me to think that she still feels that way for me, years have past and people change. Yes I have enkoyed our friendly coffee meetings over the last few years, we talk about everything but the way we truly feel, and I don't think I would ever bring it up, for I don't vere want to put our friendship at risk, I couldn't loose another dear friend._

But with all these thoughts going on in her head Minerva still had to find something to wear. Eventually she settled herself on her newest set of robes in the colour of a rich, deep royal blue with silver embroidery. "That will just have to do" she told erself as she looked in the mirror before glancing at the time piece on her mantle. She placed her hair in its usual style and set off out of her rooms and in the direction of the entrance hall to meet the rest of the supervising staff.

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_okies thanks for getting this far - i'm sorry that it kinda a short chapter but i'll make up for it i promise lol. now please do hit that lil review button just below - PLEASE!!!! lol_


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